We’re not ‘koi’ about admitting our mistakes

We like to end each year by looking back at the collection of typos and usage errors that came across the copy desk and almost made it into print in one of our 12 weekly publications during the year.

X-rated

One word that newspapers use hundreds of times in each issue is public, so it’s not difficult to imagine how often that word gets changed to pubic. It’s a constant battle, one we usually win but occasionally lose. Here are three examples that we did catch.

• We reported on the appointment of the Monmouth County undersheriff, who would be in charge of pubic information. An internship at Playboy magazine would probably be helpful for this post.

• A proposed zoning change would encourage “open spaces for pubic gatherings and interaction.” Now there’s a plan that would get the public out to municipal meetings.

• “ ‘Discovering Beauty with Art and Travel,’ an exhibit of paintings, photographs and sketches by New Jersey artists, is on exhibit at the Red Bank Pubic Library through Sept. 28.” That surely would have been the most controversial library exhibit in the state!

We also typed in a community news item about the Chamber of Commerce providing donations to the St. James and Community Presbyterian food panties [pantries]. That sounds like a charity parishioners might not want to get behind (pun absolutely intended).

You scratch mine, and I’ll scratch yours

Sports articles are a gold mine for bloopers. A Sports Shorts item sent to us told of a Recreation Department looking for players for its 55-and-older Slow-itch [pitch] Softball League.

Coach wanted. Dead or alive. From a Monmouth University baseball story: “We had our opportunities, but we just couldn’t get it done,” said head coach Dead [Dean] Ehehalt, now in his 12th year as the Hawks’ coach.”

Some tough stains to get out: “Softball is a grass routes [roots] sport.”

Calling Ben Gay: “Members of the Jersey Sore [Shore] Boca U16 team making the 12-day European trip are ...”

No steroids, no smoking, no sex for this team. “This game showed a lot of people our ability to rebound and fight back. At no time did the kids conceive [concede].”

Getting the lead out. “For the senior-leaden [laden] Braves, it was a wonderful way to close out a season and the career of its four 12th-graders.”

“Taylor Masin placed fifth among 100-[10]-year-olds on the vault.” Now that’s the real Senior Olympics.

Whale of a tale: A youngster participating in the Maccabiah Games in Israel visited the Whaling [Wailing] Wall.

A religion good enough

to eat

“Edna Toth, of Avenel, gets one number closer to bingo at Our Lady of Mount Caramel [Carmel] Church in Woodbridge Friday night.” You wouldn’t have much trouble getting people to go to this church.

Not the time or place

for principles

An article about a town’s officer of the year noted that he was selected for his “outstanding dedication and commitment to the fundamental goals and principals [principles] of police service.”

A letter writer also had problems with principles: “I was not aware how much our superintendent’s salary is. … Simply, there is a very competitive marketplace for superintendents and principles [principals] in this state.” We can dream, can’t we?

Tool time

In a March announcement about a dinner-dance honoring the FoodBank of Monmouth and Ocean Counties Humanitarian of the Year, the emcee was local radio personality Big Hoe [Joe] Henry.

It’s the thought that counts

In complimenting a Teacher of the Year award winner, a principal said, “She is unique among the elite in that it is the second time she is honored. She is a massive teacher that serves as a resource to students and staff.”

We were not sure if that was what the principal said or what the reporter heard; at any rate, we deleted that left-handed compliment.

Got soul?

A story described how the “soul [sole] of a sneaker” left an imprint. Sneakers already have tongues, so why not souls?

Geneva Conventions violation?

“The clambake will include chowder, clam fritters, steamers, potatoes, onions, fish, assorted sausage, corn on the con [cob], stuffing, watermelon, free soda and $5 for all the beer you can drink.”

Don’t be koi

“In the couple’s front yard … 14 large coy [koi] swim in a pond with a small waterfall.”

Another public-funded statue averted!

“Funds collected were not deposited within 48 hours because staff stated they were not aware of the statuary [statutory] requirement,” according to the resolution.

Amazing dog tricks and kissing kids

For a dog walkathon “preregistration guarantees a shirt, but pets can sign up on the day of the event.”

A headline on a letter to the editor reflected the writer’s opinion that the “public shouldn’t pay for private bussing

[busing] to private schools.

Mea culpa, many times

Everything up to this point did not make it into print; however, we all know not every mistake was caught before publication. Here is a sampling of the bloopers that did get published:

Let them eat dirt!

In some editions, one of our opinion columns stated:

“The New Jersey Environmental Federation calls [the fast-track law] ‘the worst environmental law passed in New Jersey’s history.’

“And it isn’t just the tree-huggers, crystal gazers and humus [hummus] eaters who think this law is a stinker.”

Taking our lumps: A cover story about finances described a “lump some [sum].”

Another cover story quoted an official using an expression many people (including some of our writers and editors) aren’t familiar with: “They made that position up out of oil [whole] cloth.”

New Jerseyans can take pride that Gov. McGreevey’s successor jumped right into his duties. In a letter to the editor, our chief of state was described as “active [acting] Gov. Richard Codey.”

The same letter went on to describe small businesses as “being put in a vice [vise]” with every last dollar being squeezed from the taxpayer. Vice in New Jersey? C’mon now … that should have been the first clue that it was the wrong word.

Not all that glitters is gilded. A cover photo caption described how the setting sun “guilds [gilds]” the buildings.

Adele Young is the news editor and head of the copy desk at Greater Media Newspapers.